Hey guys! Just thought I'd drop a couple lines of things that have been hilarious to me in the past. I'll try not to post anything where it was a "had to be there" situation. Oh and for the purposes of maintaining relationships the authors shall remain annonymous. ENJOY:
"We couldn't fly to Houston anyway, because we don't have our passports"
Me: This nurse keeps calling my niece a boy
Friend: "WTF doesn't she see that she doesn't have a penis it's not like they were diapers"
Me: WHAT? ::laughing::
Friend: Babies don't wear diapers do they?
Me: Why wouldn't they wear diapers?
Friend: I didn't think they made em that small.
Me: So....what did you think they did?
Friend: I thought you just laid them on a blanket and washed the blanket whenever they pee'd or boo booed
"I pray for myself out loud so that I can make sure God hears my prayers"
Random Insults I've heard/read:
"You look like a cringe sandwich with extra ratchet sauce"
"You look like blackened disaster glazed with a puree of wtf sauce"
"You look like a routine tanning gone awry"
"You smell like a 12-piece bucket of 'Shitken'"
"You look like an overturned truck full of recalled meat-portions"
"You look like an UN-satisfactory clean up on aisle three"
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